This Is Your 30 Day Healing Challenge—It’s Time To Move On And Let Go For Good

To be adapted and repeated for as long and as often as needed. It’s your journey – how you take it is entirely up to you.

Day 1: Name Your Pain

Take your time with that one, and be extremely specific. Don’t worry if you have to start a few times over if you have to tear out pages and cover them with ink blotches and arrows. The main point is to have your story out, for you to have a name for what causes you anguish. “The thing that happened in high school” is too big and nebulous to move on from; “letting go of the voices of my bullies”, on the other hand, is something to work with.

Day 2: Set Your Intentions

Try to whittle it down to a single sentence, but if you need more space, that’s fine too. At this point, you’ve been living with this pain enough to be sick of it. You know that letting go of it will have a positive impact on your life. Write down what it is that you want to let go of and why, then stick it somewhere you will see it every day: Your fridge, your night table, the front cover of your journal; set it as your desktop, your screensaver, set an automatic email to come to you every morning, whatever works. Just make sure you have a regular reminder of why you’re doing this and what you are letting go of.

Day 3-5: Take Stock

There’s probably a tonne of things in your life that remind you of whatever it is you’re trying to move on from. Some of it may be obvious – here’s that knick-knack she got me, or this picture from a tournament he took me to – some of it may be less so, like how hard you work to please everyone. Reminders of a person, or an event, may come tumbling in front of you like dusty candy in a coat pocket for weeks to come – what’s important now is to figure out where the bulk of it is. Think of it as a scavenger hunt, and make a list of all the reminders in your life – take a few days to comb through your house, your car, and finally, your habits, and locate those dusty candies so that you’re ready for the next step.

Day 6: Enlist Help

Find your meanest friend – the one who liked him the least, or the one who told you she did not deserve you – and tell them what you’re doing. Be specific – use your script from day 2 if you have to. “I’m on a mission to reclaim my (head)space so that I can finally direct my energies onto healing. Will you help?” You don’t have to scream it from the rooftops or round up your whole coterie – at this stage, you need only one or two people. What is important is this: They need to love you, and they need to be merciless.

Day 7-8: Purge Your Physical Space

If there was ever a perfect excuse to do the full Marie Kondo, this is it. Have your mean friends on hand, put on some appropriate music (fun fact: according to Bruce Dickinson’s biography, Iron Maiden never released a proper love song) and then let the recycling extravaganza begin. If you can’t bring yourself to throw physical mementos away, stick them in a box for your friends to store (where you have no access), or put it in a donations bin. Don’t let yourself ruminate – the only questions you need to ask are: “Can this be used by another human being?” And, occasionally, “Would I need this in the future?” (Think Legal documents and professional qualifications.) Your friends will help give you a reality check – you don’t need to throw away a teddy bear if someone else can use it, but you equally don’t need to shred your Masters Degree if it reminds you of your controlling relative.

Day 9: The Dust Bunnies Will Run For Their Lives

Fact: tidying up makes a mess. Take this time to clean up your home, launder your clothes, scrub the toilet, banish the old spices from your cupboards, the works. Can you do that the previous two days? Sure. But I would advise against it. Firstly, your friends came to banish the ghosts from your head, not the grease stains from the kitchen, which is arguably not as fun. Secondly, being alone in a newly tidied house can make you antsy. No better way to get rid of that extra energy than to dust every nook and cranny of your home, and sending the dust bunnies running.

Day 10: Make Two Lists

Grab a piece of paper. On one side, write down a list of “Things that drove you up the wall about (the thing you want to move on from)”. On the other, write a bunch of thoughts, people, and activities that you liked, and that the person you’re healing after would absolutely DESPISE. Pick three things from the second list and research the ones nearest to you. What are they about? How much effort would they require? How much do they cost?

Day 11: Make A Plan

Pick one of the three things you researched the previous day and make a plan to do it within the week. Commit to it – pick up the phone, put down the card detail, ask your mean friend to take you there under pain of social media roasting. Be mindful of your budget, of course, as well as how much energy you can spare after work and helping your loved ones. But also, you need new passions in your life. If you feel hesitant, remember the first list you made yesterday, and remember that this is something purely for you.

Day 12-14: Adulting Stuff

Chances are if your mind and soul is hurting, your body wasn’t doing too great either. Are you getting enough sleep? Are you eating food that you find delicious? Have you got the bills and budget down pat, so that you don’t have to scramble to pay anything at the end of the month? Run through those things while you’re still on a high from doing the thing the person who hurt you would hate so that you can tick off all you procrastinate over. Dentist checks? Doctor checks? Nobody loves them, but get them done as much as possible now so that you can have 12 months of not having to worry about it.

Day 15: Forecast Of An Emotional Storm

It’s been two weeks since the challenge started, and you’ve accomplished so much! You wanna pat yourself on the back, except… your dentist found a cavity, or you pap smear was due, and even though everything went off without a hitch and you are fine now, you’re probably feeling a little bit raw. You can’t find your favorite comfy sweater and you remember it was a gift from That Person, and it just reminds you how kind and comforting they were, and why did you bother in the first place…

You may want to be mean to yourself, or else call the whole project off. What I’d like to invite you to do instead is putting your phone away and letting yourself have a nice, big cry about it. (Or shout and punch a pillow. Or turn up your music and scream along to Lorde. Whatever mood strikes you.) Take as long as you need, until the emotion has spent itself.

Day 16: Read Back Your Intentions

The previous day might have left you with an emotional (and a real) hangover. For recovery, take your story from day 1, and your intention from day 2. Reread both, taking your time to let the words sink in. Notice the anguish in your voice, the difficulty in writing the words. Cry a bit again, if you have to.

Here’s the tea: chances are, it was not all that bad. It’s human to feel sad, to remember the good times, to wonder if you weren’t the one in the wrong after all. Times like these, it’s okay to feel sad; but it’s also important to remember exactly why you needed to get away, to let go, and to heal. Specificity helps us parse out the good from the bad; it lets us acknowledge the happy times existed AS WELL as the bad ones. It’s not either/or: it was both, and the bad stuff made you want to leave.

Day 17: Make Another List

Write out a list of your achievements. Then write out a list of reasons why you, objectively, achieved them. Think: Master’s Degree – you worked hard, you did your research, you were passionate about the subject, you helped others, etc. Don’t be tempted to editorialize, aka “I only got it because the teacher liked me”. You got it because you worked for it. Make a list and put it near your intentions from Day 2, so that whenever you want to call yourself lazy or stupid, you’ve got a rebuke right there, on your eye level.

Day 18-20: Start Habits That Make You Happy

Remember that activity you tried earlier? On day 11 even? Did you like it? Did you want to do it again? If not, what would you like to do instead? What would make you excited to get out of bed in the morning? Starting new habits, hobbies, or re-focusing your energy on things that you were passionate about but let go of; these are all ways for you to remind yourself of your own power.

Day 21: Check In With Your Friends

Your mean friends may want to get rid of the stuff they stored for you, but they likely won’t until you say so. Have a nice catch-up, a roast, or just a day/night out with friends. Check in with yourself after that night is over – how do you feel now that you’re starting new things and looking after your body? How does spending time with your people feel like? Do you want to do more?

Day 22-23: Rescind Your Invitation To Emotional Vampires

By now, you’re probably seeing glimpses of your old self. Depending on how much time has passed, you’re either taking baby steps forward, or you are repeating self-healing steps that helped you in the past, and you are coming into your superpowers. Time to examine your friend group: Who are your allies in your quest for healing? Who are suddenly disinterested in you, now that you’re no longer miserable? Are they happy to see you improve, or are they forcing you to remember bad times?

In the past, you may have held onto the wishy-washy and the jerks because you had no-one else. Or, maybe they were just okay, but now you see you just hang out because of habit. Either way – there’s no harm in seeing people you like one-to-one, and “losing” the numbers of those you don’t.

Day 24: Cloudy With A Chance Of Boredom

Most self-healing is done quietly, alongside your daily life. You go to work, you come home. You fix the same food you always have, do the same things to unwind. Once the drama of the initial few days has settled and you have made self-asserting boundaries part of daily practice, you’ll find life becoming routine… even boring.

Remember: boredom is good. Boredom means the worst of your worries can be taken care of later, and that you are no longer living in a constant state of crisis. Yes, it’s not nearly as exciting, but it’s also self-protective and self-loving.

Day 25: Brace Yourself For A Surprise Storm

Remember those dust candies tumbling out of pockets? Or those emotional vampires you just banished? There’s a chance a few of them might pop out: a song comes onto your playlist that you forgot to purge, or some “friend” lets your ex have your new phone “accidentally”. Have your mean friends’ on speed dial, or plan for a few extra new and exciting things to do. Or clean up your house again, or run one more mile… whatever works to keep you occupied until the urge to call back has passed. Check-in with your intentions if you have to.

Day 26: Acknowledge You Got Through

So you survived the storm. Even if you gave in and returned the call, met the person for a drink, ate whatever shit they served you… you’re here. You may be rattled, but you got through. Meanwhile, if you didn’t give in, you may be wondering if it was a fluke. Pat yourself in the back either way. Your worst nightmare may be to return to the bad situation, but as long as you are here today, there is hope. Remind yourself that you are human, apologize if you have to, and resolve to keep doing the right thing. Next time, you’ll know better.

Day 27: Two Final Lists For You

Remember how tempted you were to ruminate about Those Good Times? Now you have a chance to – write down all the good about the person and the situation, or what you perceived to be good about it. Be specific. Once that’s done, turn the page. List out all the good that wasn’t there, but that you wanted to have, that you wish you can have. Take as long as you need, and be as extravagant as you want.

The first list is what you got out of the bad situation, the stuff that kept you stuck. The second list is what you want, what you could have ON TOP of the good stuff from before… but without all the bad.

Day 28: Allow A Private Moment Of Grace

Maybe you’re still feeling dubious or rattled. Maybe you think that your perception of the situation was wrong, or at the very least you need to acknowledge the good that the other person did for you. This day is your permission to do it – in PRIVATE.

Write a letter, listing out all those good things the other person did, and thank them for the ones they genuinely, honestly did to help you. What this means is, don’t thank them for every gift that came with strings, or the stuff that they did because it reflected well on them. Don’t thank them for supporting your studies if they constantly rubbed it in your face, or for raising your kids if they used that as a justification to cheat.

Thank them for the true moments of selflessness, for the honesty, for the support. You may still end up with a nice letter, but chances are, it will be a lot shorter than you think. Once you’re done, stick it in a drawer and don’t send it. Like with other times you exerted a special effort, the recipient is likely not to appreciate it as much as you would.

Day 29: Put It All Together

The lists, the letters, the intentions, the story. Put it in one place and look at it as a whole. The “good” list that seems excessive compared to the things that actually merited thanks; the qualities you undermined in yourself, the dreams you set aside while you settled for crumbs; the nonsense you tolerated and that you will not miss. What you have is a roadmap to the future – it’s not foolproof or anything like that, but it’s a start. You know what you want, what you need, what you deserve; what you won’t settle for, what is worthy of gratitude, and what is just a gift with strings attached. Smile. You know yourself better now.

Day 30: Keep Going

Writing your future happens every day. Sometimes you will have to repeat old steps, just to remind yourself of your power. Some things might set you back – that’s okay. The important bit is to keep going, to work hard, and to resolve to always do better.

You’ve got what it takes to move on and heal. Don’t stop.

Don’t ever stop.

My Anxiety Does Not Need To Break Me

I’m anxious not broken.

Some people walk on eggshells around me. I can see it when they move, their feet softly hitting the ground, hoping not to upset me or scare me in any way. I’m not a fragile bird with a broken wing that is going to ask you to help me. I don’t need your help. Stop walking around me as I’m going to shatter with any sudden movements.

I’m not broken. I’m not cracked. I am a flawed human being trying to make it like everyone else is.

I don’t want to be treated like a child who’s scared of the dark. I don’t want to be cooed at so I don’t cry in the middle of having an anxiety attack. I need you to let me freak the fuck out for two seconds. I promise you, I won’t be mad at you when I collect myself but I need you to back the fuck up. My anxiety isn’t something you can fix with your careful petting. My anxiety isn’t going to deem itself unfit and just leave. My anxiety does not affect you so stop acting like it does. Let me be an anxious mess.

Let me cry a bit.

My anxiety didn’t break me. It’s not going to. If anything, it put me back together after other things broke me.

My anxiety gave me a reason to be more aware of myself and less aware of you. I know it sounds harsh but it’s true. My anxiety taught me that sometimes I need to focus on myself FOR MYSELF.

You have the choice of walking away from me.

As do I. And if you do, that’s your loss.

And if I do, well it’s my loss too.

So let me ask, I’m okay with my anxiety, are you?

10 Little Reminders When You Feel Like You’re Losing Your Battle With Anxiety

1. You are not and will never be alone.

Maybe your family is far away. Maybe you’re living on your own. Maybe you truly do feel like no one is with you and no one hears you. You’re wrong. I’m here. I’m listening.

2. Your life isn’t nearly as bad as your anxiety is.

Your anxiety has a nasty habit of giving you a heightened sense of panic. It’s just a bad few minutes. Find an empty room, a bathroom stall, a closet–it doesn’t have to be pretty. Just find one, and take a moment to breathe, and you’ll realize that life isn’t nearly as bad as it feels right now.

3. Every tiny victory is one you can use to help someone else.

There’s one thing I always told myself when I was having a rough day, and that was this: every tiny victory, no matter how small it is, is a chance to help someone else. I’ve been on the edge, and I’ll take every opportunity to talk the next person off it.

4. There’s always someone to talk to. You get have to raise your head and take a look around.

There’s always someone there. For me, it was the one lonely star outside my window. I could see it just peek out from behind the trees every night. It was what I talked to. It was always there. You’ll get there too. You’ll find someone that understands, and you’ll realize that they are just a phone call away.

5. Realize the world is so big and there are so many things left for you to do.

You will survive this day. You will go on to do all the great things that I know you can do. You will make it. I know it.

6. The rest of the world doesn’t see your crippling anxiety, they see your beautiful smile.

You’re going to have to learn to show it more often. It sure is beautiful.

7. You always somehow end up surviving.

Funny how that works. Even when you feel like you’re going to die, even when you’ve given all you can give, even when you’re so close to breaking that you can see the fault lines–we always somehow survive.

8. You are so much more than just your anxiety.

You are a sister or brother, a daughter or son, a friend, a mentor. You are somebody’s everything. Someone wakes up every morning thanking God you’re in their life. Keep it that way.

9. Don’t let it label you.

You aren’t simply what your anxiety tells you to be. You are better than it. You can overcome it. You can be so much more than just a list of symptoms. You just have to believe in yourself.

10. Don’t go. You have so much left to teach us.

This world needs you. It’s not your time just yet.

9 Little Dos And Don’ts For Living With Anxiety

At 23-years-old, I have now only just started to live my life for the very first time. Everything before was such a blur. Every sight, sound, touch, smell, and taste was only something I had heard of. Every experience was mediocre. Life was bland. There was no substance. There was no sense.

It’s hard to put these feelings into words, but I will try. The best way I can describe anxiety is going through each day feeling as if you’re underwater. Nothing is clear. All of your senses lack functioning. You’re overstimulated, and the only thing you can do is shut down. There have been soo many endless days of crying. It became my outlet. I allowed myself to feel, to be vulnerable.

Anxiety is something that is all too familiar to me. Since the age of six, it has haunted me. It has controlled me, and it has torn me down more than once. It didn’t come alone though. It came hand in hand, like peanut butter and jelly, with depression.

Depression. You know that rainy day that feels like it’s never going to end? Your mood is sad. You’re exhausted. You can’t get out of bed? It’s like that, only times 1,000! It’s not just one day, two days, or even three. Sometimes, it lasts for months, sometimes years. You start to become a sucky person, flaky, insensitive and just overall a buzz kill. Not yourself.

From ages six to 23, until the day I hit rock bottom and had no other choice but up, anxiety robbed me of my freedom. I’ve been to dark places. Imagine if you must. Never physically hurting myself, but I’ve sunk into a few deep black holes where scary thoughts laughed at me while I wept.

Anxiety disorders are extremely debilitating. No, I couldn’t just stop worrying. No, I couldn’t just relax or just breathe. I couldn’t just get over it. Trust me, I wish I could, but I couldn’t.

This is one of my many but not my last attempt at describing anxiety. My mission is to educate those who are dealing with it and who have loved ones who struggle with it. There is help, and there is hope. I’m so thankful this experience has allowed me to turn my mess into a message.

Here’s what I have learned to be the do’s and don’ts of anxiety:

1. Do speak to someone! 

Anyone, a friend, a therapist, your significant other, or even me!

2. Don’t think it’ll just pass on its own. 

Sometimes we put way too much pressure on ourselves, thinking we can fix everything. It’s OK to ask for some help every now and again.

3. Do everything possible to try to stay positive. 

Show gratitude. Show compassion. Surround yourself with loved ones. Journal. Meditate. Anything can create even the slightest glimmer of hope!

4. Don’t compare yourself to others. 

Not on Facebook. Not on Instagram. Not in the magazines. Not in real life. Trust me! If everyone threw their problems into a pile, then you would act fast to grab yours right back. Just saying…

5. Do redirect your thoughts.

Distract yourself. As soon as a negative thought attacks, be prepared. Think happy. Like I said, anything is better than nothing when it comes to overcoming adversities. I have had my fair share of struggles that I honestly came to breaking point at one point so trust me when I say that I honestly was ready to do anything and everything to regain my life!

6. Don’t forget: Out of your vulnerabilities, will come your strength.

7. Do what feels good to YOU. 

8. Don’t be embarrassed to see a therapist. 

Here are a few sentences from a book I recently read and really found helpful when I was going through my funk: “No study has ever suggested that people in therapy are, on average, more troubled or demoralized than people who are not in therapy. Rather, they tend to be distinguished by the fact that they have chosen to confront the problems of poor self-esteem and inadequate contact with the self. They, thereby, offer us an opportunity to learn of a great deal about the psychological condition of the general population.”

9. Don’t forget to simply just be.

Be self-aware. Be present. Be yourself. 

Your Pain Does Not Define You

You are not bound by the things of this world—by the way you look, the choices you make, the moments you go through.

This life is fleeting, so we cannot be forever tied to these short slivers in time, and especially not to the days that buried us, to the brokenness that temporarily weighed down our hearts.

Pain is part of being human. Like breathing, like thinking we will face it inevitably, and as much as we try to build ourselves up, keep our chests beating strong and our heads held high, we will crumble from time to time. We will lose our spark. We will wander aimlessly through our days, struggling to find purpose, and passion, and patience.

But the pain that we experience will not last forever. Though it might cause chaos in our hearts, it will not make a permanent home.

The heartbreak, the loneliness, the bitterness, the exhaustion—those things are temporary, even when it feels like they are all we know. One day we will steady our breathing, find our footing and step forward again. One day the heaviness will lift and we’ll look up at the sky with a renewed sense of self. One day we won’t think of what we no longer have first, but be filled and encouraged by all that we possess, all that is within us.

One day that pain will be a mere memory—never a definition.

When we go through trying times, sometimes we wear our pain on our faces, in our bodies, in the way we carry ourselves. We become so surrounded, so caught up in the emptiness that we let it consume us. We forget who we are.

Sometimes we allow our pain to be the first thing people see when they look at us; we become owned by it, instead of our true identity.

But we must remember the truth about pain—it is not who we are. We are not the times we’ve fallen, the failures, the tough days. We are infinitely more.

We are laughter and jokes, embraces and connections, family and friendship and moments of celebration. We are human—imperfect, but still capable of extraordinary things. We are all the small moments of our lives complied together, all the ways we’ve grown, and shaped, and changed ourselves and our world.

We are not just the times we’ve lost our way, not just bodies aimlessly wandering around here on this earth. We are not lost causes, and our value is not determined by the weight of what we’ve gone through.

Who we are as people is not comprised of the negative pieces of our lives, but the positive. By the ways we’ve stood back up after being pushed down, risen after falling. By the way we’ve continued, and never given up.

Pain is a component of our humanness, sometimes even necessary to teach us, to build us, to help us become our true selves. But it is not the determining factor of our worthiness, not the one thing that we carry or label ourselves with.

We will lose our way, lose loved ones, lose our strength and spark from time to time, but we’ll never fully lose ourselves. We may be broken, but never destroyed. We may change, but never become unrecognizable. We may experience hard times, but never embody those moments.

We may face pain, but it will never define us. 

This Is Your Reminder That You Will Get Somewhere In Life

I know it’s frustrating and difficult to know that you have been trying for some time now, maybe months, even years to get to where you want to be in life.

You are in school, but you had to take a year off for some reason.

Now you are behind and have to take a job in the meantime, but you are struggling to get work.

If you are anything like me, you may have mental health issues and that has impacted your life significantly and now you have to deal with living day to day on top of what you go through emotionally.

It’s a long and tiring road and sometimes you just want to say to yourself, “fuck it.” I am done. I have done all I can to push myself and I still am getting nowhere.

For a lot of us, we feel this way. That life is just never the way we want it to be and that our dreams, goals, and aspirations will never come to fruition.

But even though the journey has been difficult, a long and tedious one that you did not expect in 1000 years, you are getting to where you want to be.

It’s just not in the way you envisioned.

You see all those articles you have published now compared to a time when you had nothing?

That is progress. Now you have a portfolio to be proud of and show to potential editors for magazines, blogs and wherever else you want to write for.

The jobs you have on your resume?

That is preparing you for experience that you need for future employment and that is also progress.

All those letters of rejections, failed interviews, and no call-backs?

Now you know the value of waiting and what to do to better prepare yourself in the long run.

So you see, nothing tedious that we do is ever for no reason. It is always preparing us for something greater.

There is always evidence of our growth and our acceleration to our destinations, but it is often overshadowed by everything else that we don’t anticipate in life.

I can guarantee you, you are doing better than a lot of people who are struggling greatly right now in their lives and you are ahead of the game, but you just fail to realize it.

Just remember this: If you have a burning will to succeed in this life, to get somewhere in spite of your obstacles, it may take some pain, some tears, some frustration, but you will get there.

And you will have some serious life lessons under your belt as well so you are prepared when your time does come.

Do not despise meagre beginnings, you will get somewhere in life and it will be exactly where you have wanted to go.

Just be patient. 

𝓦𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓛𝓸𝓿𝓮, 𝓔𝓵𝓵𝓮 ✪

One-Sentence Truths To Remind Yourself Of When You Feel Like You’re Falling Short

  • You can’t control the outcome.
  • You can only control the way you handle the process.
  • You get to decide who you are going to be when things get hard.
  • Everything is temporary- the good, the bad & the magical.
  • There are seasons for everything- embrace the one you are in.
  • Ask yourself this question- what is this experiencing teaching me?
  • Also: how can I be/do/act better next time?
  • Discomfort means you are doing something right.
  • Nothing great happens inside your comfort zone.
  • Greatness comes from trying new things, putting yourself out there, and being willing to risk it all.
  • We’re all just doing the best we can.
  • Everyone is struggling: everyone has a little bit of pain and a little bit of joy and a whole lot of overwhelm.
  • Everything you’ve ever done – every person you’ve ever met, every experience you’ve ever encountered- has brought you exactly to this point.
  • You’re doing so much better than you think you are.
  • Be your own best friend, your biggest advocate, your most adoring fan.
  • Fall in love with the process of becoming the very best version of yourself.
  • Recognize that failure, overwhelm, and feeling like you’re falling behind aren’t some indication that you’re on the wrong path.
  • Be the kind of person who honours their commitments, who shows up every day and does the work.
  • Trust the process.
  • You’re not falling behind, you are growing and refining and chipping away at the broken parts.
  • You are building your foundation.
  • Even when things get hard, joy is always accessible because it is a deliberate choice we get to make.
  • Be brave enough to open your heart to the people who have earned the right to witness it.
  • Deliberately make time to unwind and unplug.
  • Get out of your own head and find a way to be of service.
  • This moment right here? This very second? This is your life.
  • Let yourself be awed.
  • Let yourself be confused.
  • You are not falling short.
  • You are just beginning.

Read This If You Know Deep Down You Need To Start Over

At some point in your life you will feel like every choice you’ve made has lead you to the wrong path. You will question yourself whether you really know what you want, where you want to go, who you want to be with. You will force yourself to close your eyes when no one’s around you and allow yourself to finally let your tears flow.

You will have moments when your mind will be clouded by so much confusion. You will have days when you will feel stuck and paralysed and be afraid of the unknown. Your passions will fade and your heart will be filled with so much resentment. You will have days when you will just want to go through the motions, waiting for something to happen, waiting for everything around you to change.

But there comes a time, too, when you will realize that nothing in life stays the same.

You will realize that there’s always an end in every darkness. There’s always a hope despite your brokenness. And there’s always a tomorrow to feel excited about regardless of how terrible your day has been.

You will realize that you can always pick yourself up after you stumbled and fell to your knees. You can choose to look at the sky, after all the times that you kept your head down, and see how beautiful the world is, how beautiful life is. You can smile no matter how heavy your heart feels. You can go outside, take a walk, breathe the fresh air, and let go of everything that’s dragging you down.

You can begin from scratch all over again. You can forget all the people who brought suffering in your life. You can distance yourself away from any kind of environment that doesn’t inspire you. You can go somewhere new, somewhere you know you will be safe and secured, somewhere that no one knows your name.

You are allowed to decide what kind of story you want to tell to people, what kind of nickname they should give to you, and what version of yourself that you want to show to them. This is your life and you get to choose whether you want to continue feeling miserable in one place, or leave and start living the kind of life that you envision for yourself.

Forget about the fears that are preventing you from making a big move. Forget about what other people have to say. Forget about the what ifs that are haunting you on the inside.

You have to learn how to take risks, how to be brave, how to be independent, how to make a decision for your own good. You have to know how to fail, how to be broken, how to win, how to open your heart and love someone new. You have to believe that there’s a wonderful life that’s waiting for you out there and all you need to do is take a huge leap and trust.

You need to forgive yourself and allow yourself to heal. You still have more incredible memories to make. You still have new trustworthy people to meet. You still have plenty of days to laugh, to remember, to cherish, to keep in your mind forever. You are still young and you have so much more room to grow and so much more opportunities ahead of you.

There’s nothing that you can do about the past anymore. You only have today to prepare for a brighter, bigger, and better future.

You have today to push yourself to achieve your fullest potential. And you have today to prove to yourself that it is never too late to build a new life that you have always been dreaming of. 

𝓦𝓲𝓽𝓱 𝓛𝓸𝓿𝓮, 𝓔𝓵𝓵𝓮

8 Badass Benefits Of Waking Up Early!

Do you feel as if 24 hours a day isn’t enough? I hear ya! With so many goals and tasks I set for myself I sometimes feel pretty disappointed if I can’t complete them all. Upping my productivity game whilst keeping my self-care regime in mind I decided it was time to consistently start waking up earlier and boy-oh-boy the benefits of waking up early are a game changer. And it’s about time we share them badass benefits on the blog.

However, before we dive deep into the marvelous benefits of waking up early I believe it’s important to address that you should consider if waking up early suits your needs. In other words, have a clear motivation on why you want to wake up earlier and what the direct advantage would be for your life.

Is it a loving gesture towards yourself or are you demanding something exterior to yourself?

Choosing to wake up earlier needs to be a conscious decision you make for YOURSELF. And not because we say it has benefits, or your partner says you should wake up earlier. However if you want to and you’re looking for some extra motivation, keep on reading… hehe

Personally, waking up early means I create the possibility to stress-free undertake a self-care morning routine. When waking up later I feel stuck in between what the jobs need, what I personally need and what the family needs all under the pressure of a ticking clock. No fun at all.

From Buddist monks to the world’s most successful CEO’s. Waking up early seems to be amongst their best habits. All of them dedicating that extra time to their own needs. From meditation, reflection, and practicing gratitude to working out, studying or even cleaning the house!

Badass benefits of waking up early:

You create routine & consistency

This is one of the most welcomed consequences that seems to occur with deliberately waking up early. And believe it or not, consistency is the hidden key to success.

Besides that, I experience this added consistency as a level up in my quality of life. It creates accountability. And consistency allows you to grow and progress in whatever you choose to do with that extra time you have on hand.

For example, if you choose to work-out in those early hours, within a couple of weeks you’ll find that by coming back consistently you’ll have built up muscle and a higher endurance, you’re much more at ease with certain exercises etc. Similarly, whatever you choose to do you’ll see that by consistently coming back you’ll progress significantly.

As much as I love freedom and no-planned days, the routine of waking up early makes my days so I can enjoy the unexpected instead of having to juggle the chaos otherwise.

Productivity boost

Another great one amongst the benefits of waking up early: having the pleasure of a productivity boost! Remember I mentioned I wish a day had more than 24 hours in a day? Well, by waking up early it seems my wish is being granted…  By being able to utilize the hours that I have more productively.

Waking up early is giving yourself the advantage of being ahead of what is coming. You have the time and space to allow yourself to mentally prepare for the day. What do you want to get done today? What needs to get done? etc.

You get to choose how the day goes!

Nothing external has power over you. Utilize the early mornings in such a way where you can create your own moment where you decide with which intention you step into the day ahead of you.

Besides all the above, if you’re not set on exactly what you need or want to do in the mornings you can use that precious time to get nagging tasks out of the way. Clearing up space mentally for a more productive day. Those tasks won’t distract you during the day as you’ve already tackled it when everyone else was sleeping.

Good time to make decisions

For some reason, the fresh morning energy is super contagious (love it!). After a night’s rest, you’re able to exploit that clarity of the rising sun in your own mind. Making important decisions goes with less effort and more positive rationality.

I believe a great reason for that is during the day we easily get (subconsciously) overwhelmed by external stimuli. From people, from emails, social media, the weather, the news etc. After a period of disconnecting (sleep), we’re more likely to be in tune with our true and intuitive selves.

A rested mind is a useful mind. Use it to your benefit and voila, life will thrive before your eyes.

Another reason why its easier to make decisions in the morning is scientifically confirmed. Researchers found that the prefrontal cortex, the frontal lobe of the brain, is the most active during and immediately after waking up. And this part of the brain is related to the ability to differentiate conflicting thoughts and is capable of arranging thoughts and actions in accordance with internal goals.

Active creative thinking

Another one of those yummy benefits of waking up early! Similar to being able to make clear decisions, your creative thinking is more active. And you can use this to your advantage. By doing some activities that require that extra creative alertness and input. Such as creative problem solving, brainstorming a new concept, or writing something.

5 Ways To Reduce Stress

Juggling the daily demands of work, school and family life isn’t easy. Between work deadlines, school exams and raising children, many of us experience different levels of overwhelm and stress. Finding the time to relax may feel impossible but it is achievable with the right tools. In today’s post, I will be sharing 5 ways you can reduce the stress in your life.

  1. Getting Enough Sleep

Our body undergoes a series of biological responses when we experience stress. Certain hormones and neurotransmitters are released as a result of changes affecting the natural state of the body. In fact, several hormones work together to help regulate your sleep-wake cycle. When prolonged stress occurs, this cycle becomes disrupted setting off a cascade of physiological effects such as moodiness, cognitive impairment, and behavioral changes.

Based on these effects, I think it’s safe to say that getting enough rest is vital to daily functioning. The struggle for many is creating a daily routine that promotes good sleeping habits. As someone that has experienced many restless nights, I know the importance in creating a sleep routine.

Lately, I’ve been trying to take the following approach to get a good night’s rest.

  • Putting my phone on silent an hour before going to bed prevents me from checking any alerts and notifications that go off. This approach is helpful because it allows me to start my nightly routine without interruptions, which can further delay going to bed on time.
  • Having a bright light on acts as an external stimulus, encouraging the body to stay awake. Therefore, similar to putting my phone on silent, I turn off the lights at least 30 minutes before I’m ready for bed.
  • Reading a book is something I do most nights. It’s a great way for me to relax and to catch up on some of the newer books I’ve purchased.

Creating a sleep schedule will benefit you in many ways. Play around with different methods to determine what works for you. Once you figure it out, become consistent with implementing it. Over time it will become second nature and you’ll feel much more rested each day.

2) Eat A Balanced Diet

I don’t know about you, but whenever I miss a meal or go a long time between meals, I can become HANGRY. The slightest things suddenly become irritating and my energy level is almost nonexistent. Relief from this momentary madness is only provided once I eat something.

Getting proper nutrition provides your body with essential vitamins and minerals. These nutrients allow you to have the physical energy needed to make it through the day. A poor diet affects the way your body responds to stress. Research studies have shown when the body experiences stress, GI absorption, intestinal permeability, and mucous & stomach acid secretions are affected.

In order to limit some of these negative effects, I started meal prepping. When my meals are planned in advance, I eliminate having to scramble at the last minute to cook something. This alone makes my day easier and I feel better knowing I’ve put fairly nutritious food in my body that will give me energy.

Pinterest and Instagram are excellent sources if you’re looking for recipe inspiration. Before creating a grocery list, I suggest saving a few meal ideas from these platforms. This approach allows you to determine what you need to purchase and helps to reduce overspending which is a bonus.

3) Create A Daily Schedule

 I LOVE being organized, so much so that it’s probably a bit obsessive. There’s nothing more stressful to me than having a million things to do and not being organized enough to complete each task.

Each weekend I sit down and compose a list of important things that must get done. I rank each from highest to least important, including any important due dates. After writing everything down, I will input them into my digital and physical calendars.

You can create a similar daily schedule with the following approach:

  • Make a list of your daily non-negotiable tasks (ex: work, school & home)
  • Rank the order in which you want to accomplish each task (easiest to hardest or vice versa)
  • Create a time block to work on each task

This is a great way to reduce your stress level because as you cross things off your list you build momentum. There’s nothing better than when you reach the end of a long to-do list!

4) Engage In Physical Activity

Taking time to engage in physical fitness is very beneficial to your health and an excellent way to reduce stress.

Exercising increases endorphins released in your body. Endorphins are neurotransmitters that produce what’s referred to as “runners high”. When you exercise these levels increase, resulting in you feeling energized.

It’s recommended to get at least 2.5 hours of moderate exercise each week and around 1 hour of vigorous exercise such as jogging or swimming. Creating a workout plan will help you develop good exercise habits which will help to reduce daily stress. 

5) Schedule A Self Care Day

Setting aside time to treat yourself is one of the best ways to reduce stress. Neglecting your mental, physical and spiritual well-being can add to the negative emotions experienced during stressful moments. Spending time enjoying your favorite things helps you to deal with stress in a positive and productive way. 

I’ve designated Sundays as my self-care day, each week. I spend this time doing things that are meaningful to me. I will give myself an at-home manicure, do a little shopping, or curl up with a good book. While I appreciate each day that I’m given, I look forward to Sundays because I know it’s the one day of the week that I have something scheduled for myself that I want to do.

Whether you decide to spend time with family, go to a spa, or sit in bed watching TV, practice scheduling a self-care day. You will be surprised how engaging in meaningful activities during this time improves your overall mood.

I hope these tips provided you with some useful ways to reduce and manage stress. Learn to take each day as it comes. No matter how difficult things may be today, tomorrow is a new beginning. Let go of whatever may not have gone your way, and make the most of what you have at this moment.